My essay, "I've Been Pickled" is featured in a recent publication of Chicken Soup for the Soul --Age is Just a Number-101 Stories of  Humor and Wisdom After 60.  They changed the title to "Showing Up".  Its about showing up for Pickleball and how it showed up in my life!

I’ve  Been Pickled!    By Violetta Armour

 

“ I want to feel my life while I’m in it.” Meryl Streep

 

The phrase “ I’ve been pickled” implies a dilemma of sorts. And perhaps not in the best way. Or it can refer to the name of a sport that is sweeping the nation.  Pickleball is the fastest growing sport in America, primarily with senior citizens. I’ve heard that in large retirement communities such as the Villages in Florida, people line up at 6 am to get a court. 

 

I’m 79 years old and several years ago witnessed the sudden and unexpected death of my husband Don of thirty-two years. Eighteen months later I met Jim, a gentleman who opened my heart to love again. Sadly, he too passed unexpectedly, due to a fall, four months after we met.

 

My grief therapist said you don’t have to be a soldier to experience PTSD.  Yes, I felt like I had been mortally wounded in combat and wanted to remain hidden in a fox hole. 

 

Now almost three years later I have not only emerged—poked my head out of the sand-- but feel that life is good and in many ways better than it has ever been, with no disrespect to loved ones who passed.

 

As crazy as it may sound, I give the sport of Pickleball a lot of the credit. 

 

After my losses, I was fortunate to have tremendous support of family and friends at every turn, but pickleball provided an outlet with unexpected benefits. The obvious one was physical activity but it delivered so much more.

 

My husband and I were introduced to the game in 2015 at our summer residence near Flagstaff, Arizona, where the pickleball courts were a 2-minute walk from our door.  We got hooked on the game itself but also enjoyed the friendships that quickly developed. Hey, when people see you a few minutes after you wake up with no make-up and accept you, there’s an instant comradeship. 

 

When Don passed in April, 2017, the first time I went to the pickleball court in May without him was hard but once again fellow picklers pulled me through-- and running around the court and working up a sweat surely released some of those precious endorphins. Not to mention the release of anger (that often accompanies grief) when you slam the ball as hard as you can.  

 

When I returned to my winter residence in Phoenix, I discovered that the nearby senior center offered pickleball indoors and outdoors as well as at my local YMCA.  I began to play at each place and in some ways it was easier because many of these people never knew Don so his absence wasn’t felt as much.  And for me, it was a new circle of friends.

 

Now in addition to the physical benefits, here’s the REAL secret to the magic of pickleball. It’s the social time on the bench or bleachers while you’re waiting your turn for a court. You’ll meet people from all walks of life with interesting past lives, all ages, and they come in all shapes and sizes. You don’t have to be a super athlete to play. It’s a short court and a short game (11 points to win—usually takes about 15 minutes per game). 

 

There were mornings I awoke with a heavy heart after my losses. Some days I just wanted to burrow back under the covers, but pickleball was an easy option where I could choose that very morning if I wanted to go or not.  I didn’t have to sign up ahead of time but it gave me a reason to get dressed and show up.  Not just showing up for the game, but for life itself.  Having a place to go each morning and meeting new people who soon became friends was a great start to each day.  It’s a great pastime for couples to do together and also for singles to meet other singles who have a similar interest.

 

This year I’ve been invited to play in a ladies pickleball league. We practice each week for our matches with other leagues in the area. Now in addition to fun, there’s a competitive edge and that beautiful comradeship that comes when you are part of a team. 

 

I’ve played at many different locations and have found each one to be friendly and welcoming to newcomers.  When I visited my children in Chicago at Christmas, I found an indoor court at a senior center near their home.  Now it’s “have paddle, will travel”.

 

I  would venture to say that no matter where you start to play, you will be welcomed. We were all beginners once and we encourage others to join in the fun.  Truly, if you’ve never played any sport or don’t consider yourself an athlete, you canplay pickleball. Because the court is small, it is not hard on the joints that require lateral moves as in tennis. You can watch how the game is played on U-tube.  If there is sound on the video, you will hear that funny pop of the wiffle ball and probably some laughter over crazy or missed shots. Really, who can be too serious about a game that has Pickle in the name?

 

My life is so good now that sometimes I feel guilty enjoying myself  so much when I’ve lost two dear people, but perhaps it’s those losses that make me  appreciate life.  To never take one day for granted and live it as fully as possible. 

 

And if  life occasionally hands you a  dill pickle, perhaps you can turn it into a sweet gherkin.

 

Oh, one more plus. Your grand kids will think you are so cool.